Anyone who is generally not part of the wedding if asked would rule on the same issue differently but when it comes to their own wedding day they make the same mistakes. Buying the most expensive items, looking at the weddings they attended and following the same venue styles/size, food menus, expensive wedding cakes, dresses, professional video/camera crew, entertainment, suits and more guests than anyone can handle. All of these items add up and the pressure cooker doesn’t rise until after the wedding day when all the bills are sitting on your table and you have a headache like never before in your life. Then reality kicks in and you start to realize how you could have been wise on your wedding day and invested in the future of your marriage instead.
You ask yourself why are you spending so much of your money on just one day of your life? You can put this money together and actually rent an apartment for years, put a down payment for a house (the halal way of course), buy a car or maybe two of them and the list goes on but rather you want to spend it on this one day and show the world what a big fancy fairy tale wedding you are having and how you look like a prince or princess.
You can look at your wedding in two ways, wedding day or a first day of your married life. If you look at it that way, it’s the first day of your married life, so you have to think in the best interest of your new family and set your family up from the first day for success as husband and wife and not sink your ship in financial debt. Like all people who get married they are in it for the long haul and no one wants to end their marriage. Have fun and enjoy yourselves but keep everything in perspective and don’t look at others to have fun at your own wedding. Don’t have a measuring stick or weddings hanging over your head but rather enjoy your wedding within your means and a preset budget. You will therefore have a more relaxed and enjoyable experience all together and you will still be a prince/princess for years to come rather than just on that day.
I will end it off by saying “Wedding is not a fairy tale but the first real day of your married life.”
muslimmarriageadvice
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2 comments:
This is so true! Especially for the young people who seek advice! If we all would commit to this, who knows what the world would be like!! May Allah help us all!
Subhanallah. Great reminder.
I always wanted a simple islamic wedding.
My Nikkah was low key with just very close relatives in my house. And my walima was with family and a few friends in my husbands family home.
Before my wedding i attended 4 weddings within the same year. All extremely over the top. And huge costs one i went to they had spent 30,000 on the wedding day! and may i mention they also had a huge henna party, engagment party and nikkah party and the walima. So it must of cost them over 60,000 for all the parties.
When it came to my own, i managed to get a photographer, and have a henna artists, and dresses and a live nasheed women group with duff. All for an extremely reasonable price.
In total my henna, and walima cost us £5,000, including food, clothing, rental, photographer, henna artist, sheep to slaughter, cakes, sweets etc etc.
We saved on invites, as in the Moroccan community invites are word of mouth we do not send out paper invites in Morocco. Also sweets and cakes were made by my in laws.
Inshallah i hope to do a blog post later this year about my wedding and how we saved money and being practical.
Because, we were sensible me and my husband were able to go to perform Umrah in Ramadan in the same year and also go travel to a few places Alhamdulillah.
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